January 26, 2007

• Introducing My Libby-Girl

                                         Hello once again,

      Yest. when my cell phone rang and I answered, a tearful little voice asked in quick succession,  "what are you doin' Mama, when are you comin HOME, I want you to come and pick me up, I need you! "and then a little sob caught in her throat. Poor dear...she doesn't know how hard it is to leave her behind 'n how it tugs (or yanks!) at my heart-strings when she does this-- it's happened about 5 times now since we moved.

      This little voice belongs to "Libby" who is "my baby" back in Missouri. She was placed into my arms when she was two n a half weeks old and I helped her young mother (21 at the time and going thru divorce) raise this child. She also had an 18 mo. old bro. whom we were taking care of since he was 15 mo. old. Libby's mother worked as a nurse's aide n put in long hours,  so Libby was with us alot,   even after jobs and circumstances changed ...she was our little girl.  She and I bonded almost like she was my birth baby, and she called us Mama & Daddy from the time she could lisp her first sweet words--which she continues to this day--even tho' she is now 5 1/2 yrs. old.              (and yes, she still sucks her finger....a comfort thing)                                          

      Libby not only stayed with us days, but nights as well and about every other wk. end. As she grew older she'd come and stay anywhere from 2-4 days and on occasion even longer. When she was 2 she began going on trips with us which included IN, KY, KS, OK, and eventually Colorado! When we moved out here in July, (we only brot the RV and a small horse trailer filled with boxes and smaller items) Libby had the priveledge of coming with us and spending an enjoyable two whole weeks with us before her "pa-pa" (who was one of our truck drivers and employee for many years) came thro' in the truck and picked her up 'n took her along back to Missouri.  Libby counts the days when we'll be back (at our old house as she calls it)...and so far we've been able to give her dates when we'll be there--we were back for 12 days in Aug.; 10 days in Sept.; 0 in Oct.; 12 days in Nov. (which included KY 'n IN) and 15 days the last of Dec. 'n first part of Jan. which she got to spend about half those times with us.

      The last day we were there (this last time) she didn't want to go to school for fear we'd leave before she comes home, so her mama said she could stay:)) It broke my heart yesterday to have to tell her that I don't know when we're coming back to MO....it may be sev. months this time, but we may be back there for a whole month in May, so hopefully she'll be happy with that, because she gets to go with us to Kentucky then. Her mama also promised her and Dalton they could come to CO to spend part of their summer vacation w/us, so maybe they can come home with us then!

      Pray for this little girl when you think about her-and us...she has had to adapt to alot of adjustments in her life so far, and only God knows her future. The daddy to her twin brothers who are 18 mo. younger than her, has recently moved out and that divorce is in the final stages; mama has had to work to provide for her little family for most of Libby's life, Gramma is an EMT on the ambulance 'n grampa is a truck driver....so my little girl doesn't always know where she belongs, and that's why it breaks my heart to be so far away from her, especially when the security she had in our home was also taken from her. It also makes it confusing to her when her various relatives tell her I am not her mama. Yes she knows I'm not her biological mother, and yet I think it's sweet of her to want to call me her 'mama' (since shes done it since babyhood). I call her a lot of endearing names and she knows she is loved very much. Her own mother often tells me that we are Libby's family and she assumes it'll stay that way till.....?? prob. for always. Whenever she tells me "bye" whether in person or on the phone, she always says, "I love you bunches and bunches Mama, and I miss you!" (and only God knows how I miss my little girl!)

      Now let me tell you a scary little story.....the last time we were in Missouri, one day when I stopped for fuel at the store/gas station (where Libby's mother is the manager) she told me she had a terrible scare several days prior to this. Two days after school opened again after New Years, she was at the dr.'s office with the boys (they had strep throat) she got word from (?? whoever was at the house) that Libby didn't get off the school bus. So she notified the sheriff and he went to the school and searched the bus, 'n there she was all nestled down and still sleeping!  I'm sure God was looking out for our little girl...who knows what she would've done had she woke up and not known where she was or where she was to go....(her mom said she would've totally paniced!) AND someone could've kidnapped her!!

     The bus driver was supposed to sweep out the bus and check to see if any kids were still sleeping back there--when he got back to the bus barn, which he obviously didn't do.....and he lost his job! (or so I heard.) God bless you all who took the time to read what's on my heart tonite. Love ya's, ck

  "Thou art my hiding place; thou shalt preserve me from trouble; thou shalt compass me about....for in the time of trouble He shall hide me in His pavillion......" --- Psalms 27 & 32

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